Pork and bottoms

HERE'S two minutes out of my morning.

This photo of Hojun, one of my six-year-old Korean kindy students, should set the tone.

Hojun is going through a boobs and bottom phase. He likes imitating grandpas and, up until the last few months, has had an obsession with picking his nose and eating it - a habit that earned him the name Yucky Man, which he relished.

He's also the only child in the entire school to reject the English name selected for him, because after all, as he rightly pointed out to me a few months ago, "my name is Shin Ho Jun, not Harry".
Ten points, Hoj. I like the way you think, little buddy.

So, here's a bit of Hojun style for your evening. Or, as I like to call him, Hoji Poo. (Which momentarily caused some confusion as poo is poo, but then somebody suggested maybe I meant Winnie the Pooh?)

Hojun (while patting my bottom): Teacher, I want to cut your bottom and cook it for dinner.

Me (while secretly enjoying the pat): How would you cook it?

Hojun (patting turns to more of a slicing motion): I would cook it with pork.

Katy: Pokoo?? (That's Korean for fork) Pokoo? Fork? You want to eat fork? (As you can see, nobody thinks anything of Hojun's desire to eat my bottom. More pressing is his poor pronunciation.)

(Cue five little six-year-olds imitating eating with a fork and shouting, "Pokoo? Fork?" And me giving my "I'm going crazy" look.)

Hojun: No, pork! Twe-gi-gogi!

Me: Hojun, I don't think my bottom would be very tasty.

Hojun: Yes it would, teacher. It would be tasty and delicious.

THE END